Laurel Fay and Associates, LLC
1. What's your practice focus and who are your typical patients?
Over the years, I've had the good fortune to be able to work with many different types of issues and a wide variety of clients. Laurel Fay and Associates sees individuals, couples and families, and my personal caseload is primarily couples, who are my favorite type of client. Since our beginning in 2002, our practice has garnered a reputation for being a place where clients can come after all other methods to try to improve or save their relationship have been unsuccessful.
2. Tell us about yourself.
I've known since I was twelve years old that I wanted to be a therapist; however I did think at the time it meant giving people advice, which my sixth-grade self was only too happy to do! But the drive I've always felt to help others and their relationships has stayed steady since then, and after falling in love with marriage and family therapy during my undergraduate studies, I pursued the M.S. in MFT. During grad school I realized I most wanted to work in private practice. I wanted the freedom and independence that comes with working for myself, and it's been one of the best decisions I ever made.
What keeps me motivated and in love with my work even after 25+ years is twofold: the ability to have a positive impact on the relationships of my clients, and to be able to enjoy getting to know so many amazing people. As therapists we are often let into people's lives at their most challenging times, and it is both a privilege and an honor to be trusted with the thoughts and feelings our clients generously let us share. The relationship between therapist and client can be very meaningful for both, and though it is not a typical relationship of give and take (our job is to give), I deeply value the connections I have made with my clients over the years. Knowing them professionally has enriched my life in many ways, both professional and personal.
3. Tell us the story of a patient who you are most proud of helping.
This is a very difficult question to answer - there are so many clients I've been privileged enough to try to help. I would say the clients that leave the most lasting of impressions on me are the ones who are highly self-motivated to change things, and who are willing to be brave enough to confront their own vulnerabilities and challenges in the pursuit of that goal.
One client couple that comes to mind dealt with infidelity, as many have, but this couple distinguished themselves by the husband's consistent willingness to take responsibility for his actions, as well as his openness to handling his wife's anger and hurt. Both were open to my gentle challenges too, and through the course of our work we developed an easy rapport marked by humor and vulnerability. They are successful to this day, incorporating our work as a regular part of their marriage maintenance, and they continue to be a reminder to me that hope and hard work, love and persistence can truly change anything.
4. What's one of the hardest things that comes with being a practitioner in private practice?
I'd say one of the hardest things that come with being a practitioner in private practice for me is the mythical work-life balance that everyone is trying to achieve. It's so easy to overwork on the practice or alternately set it on a kind of autopilot when other parts of my life are demanding more attention. With three children, my husband and I are never at a loss for things to do! But the things that make private practice difficult are often also the sources of greatest reward - the independence to manage my own time, for example. Even more than this, the exchange of energy that takes place in the therapy hour can be depleting, but more often than not it can be energizing and encouraging too. The greatest blessing private practice has given me over the years, beyond the freedom to craft the life I want, is the undeniable certainty that as humans we struggle with far more common problems than unusual ones. We are more alike than different, in that we all want to love and be loved in return, and this is often at the core of many otherwise different-looking problems.
5. What are the top 3 tips you'd give to anyone looking to start, run and grow a private practice today?\
The person starting a private practice today has so many more opportunities to grow and network than I had over 20 years ago, so there are almost endless ways to start, run a grow a private practice.
My top three tips would be:
1. persevere;
2. make sure you have support - of friends, family, peers, colleagues; and
3. never lose sight of the purpose - to help the clients. It's all about them. Holding this truth always in sight as your "why" is vital to success!